A police officer pulled a mechanic over for speeding. Officer: May I see your drivers license? Driver: I don’t have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI. Officer: May I see the owners card for this vehicle? Driver: Its not my car. I stole it. Officer: The car is stolen? Driver: That’s right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owners card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there. Officer: There’s a gun in the glove box? Driver: Yes sir. That’s where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk. Officer: There’s a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!? Driver: Yes, sir. Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation: Captain: Sir, can I see your license? Driver: Sure. Here it is. It is valid. Captain: Who’s car is this? Driver: It’s mine, officer. Here’s the owner card. Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there’s a gun in it? Driver: Yes, sir, but there’s no gun in it. Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there’s a body in it. Driver: No problem. As you can see it’s empty. Captain: I don’t understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn’t have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glove box, and that there was a dead body in the trunk. Driver: Yeah and I’ll bet that the lying sombich told you I was speeding, too.